Comment Spammers Eat Their Young

What really kills me about comment spam is that it comes from people. I know robots do the work, but someone makes a choice in their life to do it, promote it, build it.

Sometimes I can’t believe that people would make this choice in life- to live so parasitically, to leach off of the success of others in the form of trashy weblog comments.

This makes me wonder what these people are doing when they aren’t comment spamming. What must it be like to live life as a comment spammer?

Here’s is what I think comment spammers do when they’re not spamming:

  • They hunt endangered animals
  • Prank call 911
  • They have no physical disabilities, but park in handicapped spaces
  • Ruin movie endings
  • Fart in elevators
  • Hit on your significant other
  • Drink straight out of the milk carton
  • Leave urine on toilet seats
  • They steal plants out of their neighbor’s yard
  • Offer to drive and then get very drunk
  • Cheat on taxes
  • They root for terrorists

Any additions?